At the initial Spectacle screenings, I presented this version:
Feedback I received:
- The music is too intense; needs to be more minimal in order to work well with the visuals and add to the idea.
- Lots of the shots chosen were too obvious for the intended audience – they’ve seen them too many times and the meaning that I, as a foreigner, see, might not be there for them at all. Need to move beyond the Coventry – city of concrete concept.
- The concept of time wasn’t well enough communicated – I mentioned the idea of including shots of a clock moving fast and slowly, forwards and backwards, it’s a risk of cliché but might work. If the piece would be remade, it needs adding.
- The idea wasn’t clear; the fact I mentioned something as influential and strong as the film Koyaanisqatsi made my piece seem even more underdeveloped than it really was.
- A visual idea is not enough – this kind of ambitious idea, in order to mean something, needs much better and specific planning and developing.
My comments after the feedback session:
Indeed this piece was made with very little thought and I left too little time for both the idea development and the actual production of the piece. It was the brief I had the most challenges with, as I had a very good idea of the words and theories I am drawing upon, though couldn’t quite translate it into a visual piece. At the same time, I didn’t really try developing a more text-driven piece, which might have worked better. After receiving feedback, I decided that due to time constraints I would only work on slightly improving the edit. The Spectacle piece will remain a big disappointment, and a big lesson that if you’re not excited by an idea and can’t envision it clearly at any stage (development, production, post-production), it won’t just magically appear in trying to ‘tidy up the edit’.
Here is the final version I am submitting for assessment: